No Strings Attached

"No strings attached." This is an important concept to me.

It's related to obligation. I don't like acting out of obligation - instead I want to do what I want to, not what I feel I have to. And so I don't want other people to feel like they are obligated to me when I am kind to them. If they reciprocate anything, I want it to be because they want to, not because they feel like they have to.

I especially find myself thinking about "no strings attached" when I think about my friendships with guys. It seems like being kind to guys carries so much more potential for strings - not just obligation, but the possibility of intentions for a relationship. When I'm kind to a guy, there are no strings attached - it doesn't mean "I want to date you."

Expectation and disappointment are also a factor here. If there are strings attached to my kindness, and the other person does not respond as I hope, I am crushed. I don't want to be crushed, so I try not to expect. Then we are both free.