Every New Home Needs Granulated Garlic

My brother bought a house, and is in the process of taking possession and moving in. It's an exciting time for him, and by extension, for the rest of the family.

I hear that when my Dad discovered my brother's intentions to buy himself a house, he asked, "What's wrong with living here with me?" My brother responded, "I should probably move out of my parent's house before I'm thirty." Good point. And apart from a semester when he rented a room in another city for a work term, this is his first time really on his own. (When he moved away for school, Dad moved too to provide him with a place to live. Although Dad's not home much and my brother basically has the place to himself, it's not the same.) It's an exciting time.

Mom and I were talking about this big step a few weeks ago, and talking about how we can help him out. "One thing I really appreciated when I moved out," I said, "was that you gave me spices." It can be overwhelming to have to buy the myriad of spices that a kitchen needs right off the bat, and one Christmas she gave me filled spice jars of everything our family tends to use. "We could do that for him too!" So when I last visited her, I brought along my extra spice jars and the spices I've bought large quantities, and we raided the extra spices in her freezer as well and came up with a good assortment of spices for my brother.

She went to visit him last week, to see his new house and bring him all the household things she has been accumulating for him. Among those gifts was the spices we assembled for him, and she reported back to me that he was really excited and grateful to receive them. He put them into the cupboard right away, although nothing else was unpacked yet. He appreciated it. I had also given him a bottle of dish soap and a couple homemade dishcloths (other things I consider immediately essential when you move out), and she reported that he had those ready by the sink, though he hadn't even been staying there yet.

"I'm glad he liked our idea," I said to Mom, referring to the spice gift. And she gave me all the credit for it. "You came up with it all on your own." So I changed my statement to: "I'm glad he liked the gift of spices that we collaborated on." But although I insisted on sharing the credit with her, I also take his gratitude personally. I suggested spices, and he was glad. I gave him dish soap, and he moved it in first and thought of me as he unpacked it. I gave and he was grateful. I was appreciated. And that feels good.