Tired

I like being a student. I like having an excuse not to work full-time, and in fact, that's one of the reasons I went back to school. I've told them that my availability is limited to Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays. But unfortunately, there are a lot of things that come up on the weekends that I want to take part in and that conflict with work. Last weekend it was the Montana trip; this weekend coming up is Choir Mini Tour, and there are other choir concerts and an upcoming wedding I've had to take time off for. I feel guilty when I have to ask for more time off on top of my already limited work week. So I try to provide them other days instead. Plus, I need the money, so I don't want to give up too many shifts.

About a month ago I went through my calendar for the whole semester and booked off all the time I'd need. I offered to pick up shifts to replace those I was giving up for the Montana trip, but when I looked ahead to this week I wasn't sure how busy and tired I would be, so I didn't offer any replacement days even though I requested the weekend off for Mini Tour. Then last week when they started to put together the schedule they asked if I would be willing to work any extra shifts. Last week I felt like everything was under control and I was doing fine, so I told them that sure, I could work some weekdays this week.

Now here we are. I'm not sure how things changed so fast, but I am exhausted and grumpy, and the extra shifts I took seem to be a direct cause of that. On Monday I woke up just angry that it was morning and that I couldn't sleep more and that I couldn't come home from class and take a nap because I had to go to work. (Seriously, I left the house yelling under my breath, "Stupid flipping morning!!) Today I was completely demotivated for everything, skipped out on my evening plans, and took a three and a half hour nap after choir. My outline for my thesis is due next week and I haven't even settled on a topic yet. Neither have I done my Greek homework for tomorrow morning.

I need to stop picking up shifts at work. Of the last ten days, I've worked seven of them and had class on seven of them. Even though my semester is a bit slack, that's too much. No wonder I'm tired and overwhelmed.

I wrote this so that in a couple weeks, after I've forgotten about how I feel this week and when they ask if I can pick up shifts again, I'll have a reminder to help me to say no.